Brian needs lotion.

Hump Day is here to rock you like a hurricane!

Just kidding. It’s like 70° today!

We started you off with Brian bitching about his stupid Red Sox & their celebration for the 20th anniversary of the 2004 MLB World Series championship yesterday before their home opener.

Also talked about Giannis’ calf injury from the game against the Celtics last night.

Today is “National Hug Your Dog Day“, but all Brian was focused on was finding a new body lotion that isn’t too greasy, is affordable, and comes in a squeeze bottle rather than a pump-style.

Apparently, there’s a new Scrabble game for people who are intimidated by the original.

Played “You’re Killin’ Me, Shaws” this morning for a shot at $10 of Brian’s morning-show money, and Dave from La Crescent did NOT win.

Did you hear about Joey Gase, the Xfinity driver? He’s got a new sponsor thanks to his actions at the Richmond race a few weeks ago.

During today’s “Bad News with Happy Music”, we had stories about the Delta flight during the eclipse, a guy in NY who drove off a cliff, a naked man who got arrested for banging on someone’s front door, a naked woman who chased a guy out of the woods with an axe, a naked #FloridaMan who decided to hop into a trash can, a guy who hung his own art on the walls of the museum that he works at, a dude in Spain that cut his father’s head off & threw it at a bunch of cars, and a man who had sex with a woman’s car for YEARS!