How We Should Elect Presidents From Now On

I think we can all agree that our political system here in the US is faulty. But if it’s gonna be broken, we may as well have some fun with it, and put in place something that I feel is a better system. So hear me out.

We get an entire pile of 8mm sockets on the White House lawn. In that pile exists one, sole 10mm socket.

From here, it’s simple. We get all of the candidates together, and whoever can pull the 10mm socket out of the pile is our new president. It’s an easy concept and it’s fun. Tell me you wouldn’t love watching a bunch of these fools search desperately for a 10mm socket on the ground. That’s quality TV right there.

Apart from being simple and fun, there is a bit of function involved as well. For example, an activity like this requires having decent eyesight. So that puts all of the 60 and up candidates at a disadvantage. Are you sick of old people calling the shots around here? Me too.

Besides, if you can find a 10mm socket when you need one, you’re basically a god anyway. We may as well let you run the country. Perhaps we can run the primaries by having people try to plug in a USB cable on the first try.

Cover Photo Credit: ASSOCIATED PRESS